Max and Zara Avatar story

Imagine a place where there are such beautiful, vibrant plants, where unique, unusual creatures live, this is a story about this adventurous place. Lisa was in the overcrowded, bustling lab.
Lisa, who is a confident intelligent girl, was a little confused and didn’t know the way to the J.B ENTERPRIZES (that’s the lab). “Excuse me where is the scientific room I want to meet my avatar” Lisa Kindly asked.
“Come on I’ll show you the way” Susie said.
“Thank you very much” The room was tranquil and calm. I could see the different avatars in the gentle, serene water. “Which one is mine?” Lisa asked “This one” Susie replied. As Lisa walked on further she could see the most peculiar things in her life. There were 3D computers they were called ‘Screen Tech’.
“Where do they get these mind blowing computers I wish I had one”? Thought Lisa. The more she was stunned the more she became unfocused. She had to get in the machine to get to Pandora.
Slowly and carefully she got into the huge machine to get to the exquisite land of Pandora! Finally she was in Pandora. She could see multicolored, vivid trees. The ground was covered in crunchy; beautiful leaves which were limey green and light red colors.
Just at that second Lisa heard a deafening, blood-curdling scream. What was it? As I turned around there in front of me was ferocious, vicious creature which tried to attack me. How could I defeat this savage beast? From inside Lisa was frightened but from outside she tried not to show it. The beast had huge wings and a terrifying face with blood as bright as a ruby red diamond. His claws were sharper than daggers and longer than swords. Even though Lisa was more petrified than she had ever been but she still had to fight this Blood-thirsty vicious creature. How would she fight this boisterous evil creature? Just then the raging, threatening beast went and was gone.
“Phew that was close” Lisa said with a sigh of relief. As she carried on she could see a beautiful waterfall. It was sparkling sliver it was the most phenomenal, astounding waterfall. The trees were all multi- colored it was fantastic. Have you ever been in a place like this? The grass was soft and smooth and was the color of a fresh fruity lime.

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17 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    PAIGE! said,

    Star- I really like the word uniqe and vibrant and I really liked your Vocabulary you made it sound more intreasting!!!!

    Wish- You coul use a better word than said but apart from that you have worked really hard WELL DONE!!!! 🙂

    • 2

      Zara said,

      Thank you very much paige for reading my story!!!!

    • 6

      Zara said,

      Next time i wil use a better word for said!!!!

    • 7

      Aiza said,

      fabulous zara you worked really hard on this enchanting story but you could use a more better word than said in your writing but so far i loved it i like it i like it i liked it a lot well done zara keep this great work up i loved your wow words in your story it was just great your wow words made your story more interesting wish: you could use a better word for said star: I loved your wow words they were great WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      🙂

  2. 8

    karolina said,

    I think thhis is a very lovely story. I think you have tryed really hard and this is a fab stroy. Star: i love your adjectives. Wish: Check you spellings that they make sence. I think this is brillinat anyway i think you have tryed really hard.

  3. 9

    karolina said,

    This is a great story i enjoyed reading it.

  4. 13

    zara said,

    i agree whith u karolina that story was amazing and i think i will read this again i like ur wow words

  5. 14

    karolina said,

    I think next time you could use a better word for said like screamed roard cryed and other many words.

  6. 16

    usman said,

    fantastic work max and zara just too fantastic.

  7. 17

    Aiza said,

    Wow zara well done i enjoyed your story well done star: I loved your wow words fantastic keep this up i loved it 🙂


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